Excerpt
Through the Valley of Grief
Worship Day 1 Seek the Lord and his strength;
seek his presence continually!
Remember the wondrous works that he has done,
his miracles and the judgments he uttered.
—1 Chronicles 16:11–12
My friend, I am sorry you are so weary. I have been too. I have fought for hope and lost. Chased peace and found no rest. It seemed like every day, with what little strength remained, I merely endured from one moment to the next. What else could I possibly do?
The answer is so much simpler than we expect—and far more powerful than we can imagine. Call on the Lord! As Jesus walked on this earth in human flesh, He faced exhaustion, persecution, and despair. He called out to His Father in His darkest hours. He knew the power of putting human sorrow into the hands of divine strength.
God
never expects you to carry life’s burdens on your own. Seek His heart in Scripture, His tender presence in prayer, every moment you feel weary. And His supernatural strength will surely be given to you. If this feels hard to believe, look back on the countless ways the Lord has carried you when you were weak, scared, or unsure in earlier seasons of your life. Ask friends to share how they’ve seen God work for your good (and their own) in the past. Let me be the first to remind you: He is with you yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He is still your rock and your redeemer.
Look back over the past weeks or months. What is one moment of peace, strength, joy, or rest you can hold on to for today?
Wail
Day 2 O Lord, all my longing is before you;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
—Psalm 38:9
The Lord loved you and chose you before the foundation of the world (Ephesians 1:4). And because He knows every corner of your hurting heart, you can bring your whole self before Him—your spirit, your heart, your mind, and all the details of your life. In your suffering, you can draw nearer to God than ever before. He is your creator, your Father, and your beloved groom (John 3:29).
Perhaps some have misled you, saying, “Don’t question God about the pain you’re suffering. Everything happens for a reason.” Please hear me! You have every right to grieve the affliction that’s befallen you. Like any good father, God is brokenhearted when you suffer. Though He may not always remove your pain, miracles happen when you courageously offer Him the hurts and hopes of your heart. The Holy Spirit works in you to bring tiny moments of lightness in the midst of such heaviness.
When you bring every fear, desire, and uncertainty to your Savior, you are singing a song of complete trust—a song that resounds sweetly in His ears. He hears you, beloved. He is with you.
What question, doubt, or frustration have you been withholding from God? Shout it out in prayer to Him! Lay it brokenly and honestly at His feet, and rest in His tender love for you.
Hope
Day 3 No one comprehends the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God.
—1 Corinthians 2:11–12
Grief brings constant inner turmoil. Especially in times of trial, we crave explanation, vindication, and retribution. We long for answers to all the whys and the how-longs of this uncontrollable situation. Like me, you may want an apology from God for allowing this to happen. We wish we had a timeline from Him to help us understand what’s happening. But remember, the Lord is outside time. His ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:9), and His plan is infinitely larger than we can comprehend.
That said, God hasn’t left you alone. The moment you accepted Christ, He gave you the Holy Spirit, who dwells in you and will never leave you. He may not give you the answers you desire, but He
will give you “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control,” and countless other gifts (Galatians 5:22–23). You have access to all of this through Christ! Rest in this promise, even as your mind reels with questions. The fruit of His Spirit is free to you. Call out to God and receive it.
Lord, thank You for providing every gift I need in order to survive today. Please produce the fruit of Your Spirit in me. For Your glory, amen. Connect
Day 4 “Go out and stand on the mount before the Lord.” And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind tore the mountains and broke in pieces the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. And after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire the sound of a low whisper.
—1 Kings 19:11–12
God wants to meet with you personally, just as His Spirit did with Elijah. He hears your every cry. His heart swells with love for you when you call on His power and hope in His promises. Jesus lived and died because He wants to meet you right in the middle of your struggles and sorrows.
Some days you will feel the Holy Spirit almost palpably. Thank God for those. But you will also have days when the Spirit’s presence won’t be obvious in grand impressions or poignant moments. Many days He will speak in a whisper, not through an earthquake or fire. For me, it was a specific whisper of wind. After a long, tearful walk with my dog, Ryman, I stood atop a small hill in Ben’s and my neighborhood. I felt the most arrestingly gentle breeze, and I remembered this story. I remembered that God is always in the tender whispers. Hold tight to those hushed moments of intimacy with Him. Know that He is with you. Continue to ask Him for what your weary soul needs, and wait expectantly with open eyes and ears. Ask God to show you daily signs of His presence.
Take five minutes to silently listen to and observe the world around you today, and ask the Lord for a sweet whisper from the Spirit.
Connect
Day 5 See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are.
—1 John 3:1
When I felt hurt or scared as a child, I would
sprint down the long upstairs hallway toward my parents’ room, often in the middle of the night. Even if they couldn’t fix what was broken or make my nightmares go away, with them was still the only place I felt safe. In your most painful moments, God desires to be near you to comfort you. You are His child. Whether you feel like it or not, He wants you to sprint to Him.
The Lord chose you, specifically, to be His child—a daughter or son of the King of the universe and a co-heir with the risen Christ. Your heavenly Father’s arms are always open to you, His beloved child. He
can fix what is broken. No matter what you’re facing, He is a safe lap to climb into, a strong hand to cling to, and a loving Father to run to in the dark. God can calm your fear and comfort you in your pain infinitely more than earthly parents can. Fall into His arms. Wail to Him. Rest with Him. He is always a safe place.
What are you most afraid of today? Speak it aloud to your loving Father, and pray for His supernatural comfort.
Hope
Day 6 What is sown is perishable; what is raised is imperishable. It is sown in dishonor; it is raised in glory. It is sown in weakness; it is raised in power. It is sown a natural body; it is raised a spiritual body.
—1 Corinthians 15:42–44
The kingdom of God is a kingdom defined by sacrifice—physical and spiritual deaths. We know this and acknowledge it every spring when we celebrate Christ’s ultimate sacrifice on the cross. Yet what we celebrate in the life of Jesus, we fear and avoid at all costs in our own lives. We long for glory but distrust God when He allows the pain that often comes first. We so easily pray, “Father, take this cup from me,” but struggle to say, “Not as I will, but as You will” (Luke 22:42).
Hear this loud and clear: God doesn’t like to see you suffer. He is always good and loving and fighting for the flourishing of His kids. I believe He hurts for us when we face difficulties. But even when He allows them, He never wastes them. Though it doesn’t feel like it now, there is valuable treasure for you to find in this trial. He can do abundantly more than you can ask or imagine with your suffering (Ephesians 3:20). As you endure faithfully, laying down the person or things you’ve lost, God’s work to raise you back up and refine you never stops. He is a restorer. “The sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to [you]” (Romans 8:18). He is making you glorious.
Lord, I hate the pain I’m in right now. Remind me today that grieving honestly and hopefully with You is worth it because of the goodness, growth, and glory You’re working in me.
